Episode 8 - How this Wedding Planner Mom Built a Multi State Business While Raising Twins | Irene of Irene and Co Events

What’s it like to run a luxury wedding planning company across three states—while raising toddler twins and traveling full-time? In this episode, Meredith sits down with Irene of Irene & Co Events to explore what it truly takes to be a working mom in the wedding industry. Irene shares her journey of growing her business during pregnancy, navigating motherhood as a wedding planner, and building teams in Connecticut, New York, and Utah. They dive into destination wedding planning, childcare strategies, partnership dynamics, and how Irene scaled to a fully booked calendar while caring for her kids. 

If you’re a mompreneur, a wedding professional, or just looking for real talk on balancing career and motherhood, this one’s for you.

🔗 Follow @irenecoevents on Instagram, visit www.irenecoevents.com and listen to The Peak Perfection Podcast here: https://open.spotify.com/show/7LoMvV4aKueSJGt6Ktlstz?si=1ed8d9c0254c411e&nd=1&dlsi=18f57de5409a46dd

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Transcript

Meredith: [00:00:00] Hi Irene. Thank you for joining me today. Hi. Thanks for having me. What time is it there, just out of curiosity? 

Irene: I'm in Mountain Time right now, so it's eight in the morning. 

Meredith: Okay. So not terrible. All right. I'm glad. No, not at all. All right. We were going back and forth on timing, and I remember you saying I'll wake up at 4:00 AM and I'm like, this woman is superhuman, so 

Irene: I Oh, my body.

My body is physically on East Coast time, but Okay. I am in the mountain time currently. 

Meredith: Okay. All right. Perfect. And you're working on a wedding out there right now? 

Irene: I am. Okay. We have three this coming weekend, so we're all over the map, which is great. 

Meredith: Are they all in the same location or are they No. In a lot of different Okay.

All over the place. Wow. Yeah. Okay. So first of all, can you just tell me a little bit about yourself just so our audience can learn a little bit about you and how we wound up being on this podcast, because spoil alert you have. Twins. I do. Yeah. Yeah. So tell us all the [00:01:00] things. 

Irene: So I'm a wedding planner.

I'm based out of Connecticut, New York, and Utah. I have three offices. So we do a lot of destination planning throughout the us. I've been doing it for 10 years. And I have, I am a mom of twins. They're four years old. I also have two dogs and a wonderful husband, and they travel with me. They go to school in different states sometimes.

It's a hoot. It's been a great experience since they're only four, we've been really navigating. What it's like to raise kids and also have this kind of career. And my husband's career is just as busy and nuts and impressive and yeah, we're just supporting each other the best we can and raising kids the best we can.

Oh 

Meredith: my goodness. Wait, 

Irene: they go to 

Meredith: school in different places?

Irene: At the beginning of this year and last year they did preschool in Utah. 'Cause that's where most of our weddings were based out of for those couple months. 

Meredith: Oh wow. And 

Irene: then this spring we transferred them to Connecticut. 'cause we were based in Connecticut.

We [00:02:00] have a house in Connecticut and then I have an apartment in Utah and then we have a family home and my office in New York. Okay. So. We even for Thanksgiving through, not even like October, November, we were in New York and they did preschool. Oh yeah, they did preschool there for two months in New York.

Okay. So they did preschool in Utah for the first half of the year. Fall like October, November, December. They did preschool in New York and then they did preschool in Connecticut starting in February. We took a longer January break and it's preschool. 

Meredith: Yeah. 

Irene: I'm making it work. Yeah. And then they did all of preschool in Connecticut, which was doing great.

And then they've been traveling back and forth between well they stayed mostly in Connecticut this summer so far, but they will be traveling to Utah with me a little in a little bit which will be great. And then right now we're planning on preschool in Connecticut again. Fingers crossed. 

Meredith: Oh my gosh.

Wow. That sounds absolutely wild. And then times two, with the whole twin thing, I'm just, I'm in awe. People can't see me right now, but I'm literally bowing like as soon as you said, as soon as 

Irene: you said 

Meredith: you're a twin mom. [00:03:00] And , you know, looking at your business. Holy cow. It's absolutely gorgeous work you do.

Oh, thank you. Yeah, and having twins at the same time, mind absolutely blown. It is possible. You can do it all. And so I'm assuming your husband works from home. No, actually. Oh my God. What? What? No, 

Irene: I think so. How does he switch all of 

Meredith: his things 

Irene: around? We've been together for 10, 11 years now.

Okay. And our kids are four, but. We both are very ambitious and we both love our careers. So he actually is a production manager for Broadway. And he builds scenery and does a lot of that kind of elements and management. So he is essentially me as a planner in a different world, in a different capacity.

Okay. Which is great. But he is actually more based out of Connecticut and New York and he travels back and forth from Connecticut and New York. So naturally those two offices mixed perfectly. Yeah. So, yeah, that's, yeah. No, he has a very impressive, [00:04:00] amazing career as well. Oh my goodness. And we just make it work together.

Meredith: Yeah. That's amazing. So you do mention about delegation in some of your podcasts. I just wanna ask, are you delegating in the twin world too? Yes., How are you managing this all? There's no way, it's just the two of you, right? You have some help I hope. 

Irene: Yeah, no, I think it, I mean, it is really hard and it's really tricky.

I, when the kids were born, we've never really lived next to family, ever. So it's been always kind of people come visit us when the kids were born or Christmas or things like that. But then other than that, we've really created our own community and our own family, which has been really nice in our local area to be able to lean on.

So we do have a few friends that will, hop in every so often. I have some great babysitters that love our children and our children love them so dearly. And then we do have a family member that comes and helps for like long stretches of time. [00:05:00] Oh good. If we know that I'm gonna be gone for a good month, we definitely.

Lean on some family to kind of come help. But then other than that, I mean, my husband, if you think I'm like, my husband's a superhero. Oh my gosh. He is off dropping the kids off at camp right now and then running to the train to go into the city and spend all day doing site visits and all his crazy things too, and then coming back in time to pick him up and do dinner and all the things while I'm here managing clients for the week.

Oh my gosh. I mean, he's a superhero in his own right. Yeah. And we couldn't do it without him, for sure. 

Meredith: Yeah. It sounds like you guys are pretty equally balanced in terms of how you take care of everything. So, if you're both have Yeah. Turns, yeah. If you have that planner mentality with your husband, it sounds like you guys share the mental load pretty well 

Irene: then.

That's good. We do. And I think there was a progress to get there. 'cause I think, of course, like mom gets it first, like they're first born and you just like. Pound on it. Yeah. But from the beginning, I think he was the most [00:06:00] next to me by my side. Supportive, involved in every decision.

I couldn't have asked him for a better dad for them, honestly. He's just as involved as I am, which is awesome. 

Meredith: Oh, that's amazing. Yeah. My husband is super involved too, so, cheers to the husbands out there, like cheers 

Irene: to 

Meredith: them. Yes. I do feel like I worry that sometimes people think that this podcast is like, a couple people have asked me , how come you haven't had a dad on yet? And, I'm not against the dads. Don't get me wrong. It's just that a lot of traditional cases, the moms tend to carry a lot of the mental load, but yes, I definitely want to talk to a dad that carries the mental load because there, I mean, there are tons of them out there that you know, and then I've yeah, there are tons of . Wedding industry dads that carry the mental load as well. And so I'm not against them, I think. I think that I just wanted the podcast to focus on people that have to carry that mental load and 

Irene: yeah, 

Meredith: I think be in the wedding industry. So [00:07:00] 

Irene: it all, yeah, I think it all has to do in terms of just like communication.

Yeah. And the expectations, to be honest. Yeah. I mean, obviously there's times that I carry more and there's times that he carries more, and then there's just communication in between of Hey, I need you to pick up your slack a little bit here. I have four weddings this weekend and I can't handle it.

I need you. This is the problem . go solve it. Please. 

Meredith: Oh, that's so good. I'm so glad that you guys are able to like, communicate like that and have it all work out. 

Irene: Oh, yeah. 

Meredith: Yeah. So can you walk me through a little bit of the timeline of Irene and co events? So, I think I saw, did you start it after the twins were born or you just dove in after?

I don't, I might be totally wrong. Mary, you just tell me. Yeah. Can you tell me the timeline and Of course, and how it all came to fruition of, 

Irene: so, Irene Coza started 10 years ago. 

Meredith: Oh, 

Irene: okay. In New York, we started with our New York office first. Right. Super fun. Got to do, got thrown right into the lions den.

Started with some tented weddings, which was awesome, and a great learning experience. And then [00:08:00] Brooklyn Botanical Gardens, Brooklyn Boathouse, like some really big venues in New York that we were really fortunate to get in from the ground level. Oh yeah, that's awesome. And then we, yeah, it was so great.

And then we expanded to Connecticut, you know, started going short throw to Greenwich and then kept throwing a little bit farther to New Haven and then Hartford. And we then established an office in New Haven, which was fantastic. And we've grown that market. It's been so lovely to be a part of that community as well.

Connecticut's actually just getting a wipa and we're so excited. Oh my gosh, that they're getting a chance to have a wpa That's gonna be awesome. 

Meredith: Yeah. Amazing.

Irene: Yeah, I can't believe they didn't have 

Meredith: one. I'm actually so surprised by that. 

Irene: Because New York chapter is so close. Oh, and then we had Philly.

Yeah. And I Boston as well. Connecticut's like that middle person that could go to any of them. So I mean, we have been just going to all of the other events. I'm personally part of the Utah chapter. I'm actually on the board of Utah. So I can't wait to transfer my membership to Connecticut. Spoiler alert in two years when I'm done with my. sentence.

But it's gonna be a great time. Yeah, it's gonna be so [00:09:00] fun. Yeah. I'm so excited. They launched this August and it's gonna be so good. 

Meredith: That's awesome. 

Irene: But, so we started there. I primarily was there, learned a lot, made mistakes, had successes, all the things. It was fantastic. And then four years ago, when Right, right after my kids were born.

So maybe three and a half, maybe No, four, full four. We decided with COVID and everything that happened and weddings were at an all time low and canceled and rescheduled, and it was crazy. We were like, Hey, why don't we just take this opportunity to have a little bit of a break? Broadway was closed for him.

I didn't have weddings. I was like, let's just go explore. And I was like, I can do anything in the world. I mean, people get married all over the world, so it doesn't matter to me where I'm, where I live. It matters where I serve out of, and I have my staff in my office. We'll continue from there. So we moved out to the mountains for a little bit.

I started the Utah office and it took off. I think I always say like scaling from a short throw from New York to Connecticut was [00:10:00] easy, but it was also like I made lots of mistakes, of course, but then I learned from them and then I did the long throw across the country and then I caught on like wildfire.

Oh my gosh. Which was awesome. So we've been so busy this year. That's amazing. Which has been such a blessing and I love that. So yeah, that's where we're at. That's how three became possible in 10 years. 

Meredith: So you felt like doing the short throw and the long throw was similar in, it was like marketing actually and all of that kind of stuff.

Okay. 

Irene: In the process of it? Yes. And in what I had to do to get my name out there and meet people and things like that. Yes. The three markets are like, could not be more different. Like I have to market totally separately and differently for each market. I price differently. It's a whole thing.

Oh. So, but in terms of the process of expanding to a new market, the process was the same. Okay. So that was good to know and understand. Yeah. But yeah, but during that, kids born five, four years ago. Five. I guess when like you, when [00:11:00] you're actually pregnant and you're like, what am I supposed to do?

Meredith: Yeah. 

Irene: 'Cause we were totally prepared for one. We were like, I'm saved up. This is what daycare costs. We picked a daycare, we had our name on a list. We were like very planning. We were great. And then we found as planners, 

Meredith: wait, so you had all of this before? Wait. Yeah. Wait. You had all of that before you even knew you were having two.

Yes. Oh my gosh. So what happened? Was it identical? Did they split later or or is it fraternal twins? They are fraternal 

Irene: twins. Okay. We had, we were pregnant before and we did have a miscarriage right before the kids. Aw. That also happened before I get it. So had a spot. Yeah. Yeah. It was really, it was a really sour time for sure.

Yeah. So we had everything lined up for him and then Okay. When it, we got pregnant almost literally immediately after. So the timeline like moved back two months. Like it wasn't even, so the daycare still [00:12:00] held it. And then we went to our first appointment and stuff. And then, I mean, finding out I had twins was a whole other story.

Oh my God. It was COVID. I, okay. The short version, it was COVID. Yeah. I was gonna 

Meredith: say, tell me this, tell me what happened, because this sounds really juicy and I love it. 

Irene: It was COVID, so you have to do everything by yourself. You can't have your husband next to you, which was so hard. Oh God. I started just like having a really bad day.

We knew we were pregnant already and I felt off. Entirely. I was so sick. It was bad. And it felt really similar to a miscarriage. So I was just in tears the whole day. I was like, I don't wanna go in. I'm gonna be fine. This is not happening again. And I was really upset. It was like midnight and we're just like, we're just going.

I can't go to sleep like we have to go. So we went to the ER and I had to go by myself, spent all night in the ER by myself to figure out what's going on. And I'm in tears thinking this is happening again. Aw. And I. Just don't even wanna discuss it with nurses and stuff. I'm just like, can we just get this over with?

Tell me I'm [00:13:00] screwed and like we're gonna move on and do this all over again and get a DNC schedule to just continue I'm done. Yeah. Then the patient mill just signed the check and the nurse, so nonchalantly at three in the morning is just like, you know, there's two in here, right? Oh gosh.

I was like, what? What are talking about? They're like, you have two children inside of you. I was like, what? That doesn't even make sense. And I like had to process this all by myself. And then she obviously didn't. She said it like the nurse tech, like doing it obviously isn't supposed to say a ton, but she obviously said it at three in the morning.

Yeah. So then I'm going back to like my little bed in a hallway 'cause it's super busy and no one has any room for anybody. And then another nurse comes to me and I feel bad. She was so excited to tell me that I had twins and I'm already sitting here reeling of what am I supposed to do? Do with that information by myself right now.

Yeah. I can't text my husband and I have to tell him and what am I gonna, and all the things like, yeah. And she comes over so sweet and she's I just wanna let you know, and does this whole thing. [00:14:00] And I'm like, yeah, they told me. I'm trying to figure it out. Can I get outta here soon so I can go see my husband?

He has a waffle waiting for me in the car. Like I need food and I need to talk to him now. Can we sign papers and leave? So, wow. It was a whole thing and I was like, well this is gonna be harder because it's two and that's why you're feeling it like this. And I'm like, great. 

Meredith: Yeah. Thanks for telling me.

Making it even more obvious that I'm already stressed out. So you already my weddings and you were like, oh my God, I'm having two. It was a whole thing. 

Irene: Yeah, I, yeah, I got my paperwork. I walked out the door. My husband had a waffle for me 'cause it's four or five in the morning. At that time, I gave him the paperwork.

I look at him, we're having twins, and then I fall asleep. For the whole cart ride. And he's just sitting there by himself and I wake up and he actually drove us to the beach in Connecticut at the time. And we woke up to the sunrise and he was just like holding my hand and he was like, it's gonna be okay.

And he was like, so romantic. My gosh. I'm like, I've been spiraling all night. Thank you. Yeah. So that's how 

Meredith: we [00:15:00] knew. Oh my gosh, that is crazy. So like in that moment, did you have any thoughts of oh my god, my weddings. Yeah. Like when? A hundred percent when were they due? Or when did you have them?

Because what? Twins. Twins come early, right? So 

Irene: Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Well, it was a happy COVID timing that I had them due on 2021. So they were born in 2021, 'cause they're four now. Okay. So when I was pregnant, most of my weddings for 2021 had already rescheduled. Okay. So I was well, what am I supposed to do now?

Like. Things are on hold, canceled. I had a few people still going forward and like just going to micro weddings and elopements. But then other than that, everyone was really rescheduling to 20 22, 20 23 at the time, which we all knew. Those were like the burnout years for all of us because everyone rescheduled and then everyone who was waiting scheduled and we were just like out of our minds.

Yeah. Yeah. So I, it was really difficult and it was very much [00:16:00] of like, how do I not lose myself and how do I not lose this business that I work so hard for in this process, but also I do wanna honor that. I wanna try to be a good mom and I do wanna try to have that so. That whole year when I was pregnant, I actually took on a third.

I had a day job at the time I had IRE co events, and then I took on a third like online virtual assistant role to save up as much as I possibly could. 'cause I knew once the kids were here, I was gonna have to take a maternity leave from one wait a couple months to be able to. Kind of continue with the other virtual assistant.

And then weddings. I kind of just always was like, I'm just gonna keep going. Like it's gonna be okay and we're gonna make it work. And then I ended up quitting my day job. Using my savings from my virtual assistant role that I had pre-planned for my FMLA leave. And I went all in and started investing in my company more specifically.

And I was like, that's it. I'm not going back to the nine to five. It doesn't work for our family [00:17:00] dynamics. Now. There's two of them. It just, it, this doesn't add up. 

Meredith: Yep. 

Irene: So we started making some serious life changes and making decisions for the kids, but in that. Instead of me trying to find like a bigger job, better job, go to nine to five corporate and keep climbing the ladder.

I was already pretty high up in the corporate planning world and the planning for like social and private events. I was like, no, I'm gonna bet on myself because I know I can do so much better by myself. Oh, okay. So I all in just. Put all eggs in one basket, gave myself three to six months. If it doesn't work out i'll, I will figure something else out financially and we can continue.

And I put my eggs in the right basket. I mean, we caught on like wildfire. We were fully booked within two months of me doing it and making me investments in the changes all while There's some really good pictures. I'll send it to you. I have. One kid here, one kid in a bassinet outside my computer right here, and I'm on the phone and it's no, I'm doing this.

Like I'm not quitting on [00:18:00] myself and I'm not quitting on my company just because I have kids. That's not the option. The option is they will see mom work really hard and they will know what it means to, earn what you've deserve and really work. Work towards your goals and it's so lovely.

Now when like I'm talking to 'em on the phone or I come home and I send them little pressed flowers from the weddings, like they always ask, well, what color was this weekend, mom? 'cause they think I color match, they know what I do, but they think it's color matching. So they're like, oh, I have a shirt that matches that.

I'm gonna go put that dress on. Oh my God, that's so cute. They love it. So for me, it's the best of both worlds that they get to see Mom. Do the things she loves, but I didn't sacrifice being a mom either. 

Meredith: Yeah. Oh my gosh. That's great. I know I heard you say one thing that I feel like people are gonna be like, but wait, what'd you do?

Because I know that, well, how did I do it? Well, like in that moment when you, that, just based on what you just said, you said that you invested in yourself, you put systems in place that then made you [00:19:00] fully booked. Now I know. You were probably pregnant at the time, right? . Yeah. What specific things did you invest in and focus on to get yourself fully booked? Because I think moms need to know. The specifics more because what is the thing? Yeah, because just because it, you don't have time to waste as a mom. Like you can't, no trial and error a bunch of things.

So like what was it? Can you give us a little insight? Like how did it work? Yeah. 

Irene: So I invested when I was seven months pregnant. That's when I was like, I quit. This is what we're doing. We're going for it. Subscriptions in terms of marketing on different platforms to be like at the top tier of like at the time the knot, wedding wire, Zola, things like that in my area.

I started with first Connecticut specifically, and I just, instead of marketing in multiple markets in a lower area, I marketed only in Connecticut at first, at the highest tier possible. I started writing articles for different blogs and sending it to the [00:20:00] editors and being like, Hey, I noticed you haven't had something written.

About this. I wrote this already. I have some content for you. If you wanna use it, great. If not, that's okay. And I would submit it to magazines and blogs and things like that. And a lot of them got published. Oh. But I was like, how much marketing and how much organic community can I build with also providing a value that's going to attract different clients and gimme some credibility more so now than ever before.

So I really focused on that. I focused a lot on relationships as well, so I would go to venue visits all the time and bring nice little gifts to the venue manager and connect with them. Especially if I had a client with them coming up, I would be extra nice and super accommodating for sure.

Because I was like, I wanted to be on their preferred list 'cause I wanted to work there so, so much. That also was really great in terms of valuing people's time and their resources that they can share and also giving them clients. I feel like it's hard to get into [00:21:00] venues when you don't have a client ready to go or someone in the near future, like, Hey, I have so and so ready for a tour.

There are many ways and many times that. In the early days, I would use new clients as leverage to be able to go into new venues. So even if I know they were really specific on a beach, like Madison Beach Hotel and they wanted that whole vibe, I would also give them very similar venues.

Like, Well, let's just make sure you really like it before we sign the contract, can we go to these other ones? And I would take them, I would do the whole thing and I would bring the venue manager each a really nice gift. Really suss it out for the client too. And there was a couple times that they did change their mind, so like great on them.

Yeah. But it allowed me to go to all these different places with a client ready to go for a contract. And seriously consider them and also build that relationship and be like, well, I'm sorry it didn't work at this time, but hey, I would love to keep you in mind for the next one. I really loved this, and this.

If you have anyone I feel like we hit it off. I'd love to get coffee and [00:22:00] continue our relationship and that kind of spiraled and grew. So it's really investing in people and investing in community. 'cause this is, I would say it's 75% referral basis and then 25% organic marketing. I did also really invest in my social media, and at the time, social media was big.

It's, I guess it's way bigger now, but I was like, I am making so much credibility and showing my work, and even if I don't think it's perfect, I need to show it. So I was. Posting like no one's business commenting, doing lives, making reels, going to different venues and like making little reels afterwards and then collaborating with them on that post.

And I was really trying to cross promote and market as much as I could. Yeah. But yeah, that's kind of more or less what I did scrappy Irene at the beginning to dig my way a hole to a booked season. Yeah. And it worked like, I think it was two or three months, and I was like totally booked. 

Meredith: Oh my gosh.

And within Utah, right, which you hadn't, 'cause you guys expanded to [00:23:00] Utah while you were pregnant. 

Irene: So Yes. So I was fully booked in Connecticut and New York for 2022 season, within the first two, three months of investing in 2021. 'cause everything's a year before. Yep. Then we decided after that fact to expand to Utah and then I had to go backwards so we.

Moved in like October, December kind of time to Utah, and we were gonna stay there. You had the twins go in Utah? Yeah, I had, well, I was physically, they were born in Connecticut in the summer. Oh, okay. All right. And then that fall, we fall winter. We made the move to Utah. Oh my gosh. And I was fully booked in Connecticut, in New York for 2022, and I was like, great.

I will, we're totally gonna do this. I'm gonna expand this new market. I'm gonna have to fly back and forth. That's when it started the major traveling. I'm have to fly back and forth from New York every other weekend. It's like that's what we're doing. So I flew back and forth from Utah and New [00:24:00] York and Connecticut every other weekend.

Did all of my clients in Connecticut and New York that weekend. And then I added only two more Utah weddings 'cause I was already booked at full capacity. So I really only didn't have, I didn't have enough dates to like book out Utah in a new market that I haven't established a team yet. So I only did two that year.

In Utah, but it was the best two I ever did. One of them got published right away in the next issue of Utah Valley Bride Magazine, and that created a lot of traffic. And then the other one, I made a great relationship with that venue and I was immediately their only preferred planner. Oh, from there I joined, I went to wedding MBA, I joined Wipa, Utah, and I was like, I am expanding this market.

I know where I know who to talk to now. I know what the conversations need to be. So I expanded pretty quickly. I got involved really fast by 2023. I was 50% New York, Connecticut, and 50% Utah. But I also expanded my market. So I actually had double the amount of bookings by 2023. [00:25:00] And they were each market was fully booked because I expanded a team.

It was great. It all worked out really well. Then fast forward, everything has kind of exploded and we are fully booked in all three states. And I mean under our hat, the amount of weddings is wild, but we also have 12 staff members now. Yeah. And planners who are really dedicated. So there was a lot of steps and there was a lot of ways that we got here.

The hustle and gather right at the beginning when the kids were born and then the expansion, there was like a whole different shift of a mindset again to kind of hustle and gather all over again in the mark in a new market. 

Meredith: Yeah. So

Irene: I hope that's helpful in terms of exactly what I did. Yeah, no, I mean that was gold 

Meredith: if you ask me.

That was amazing. Great. Yeah, I'm just in such awe, 'cause I think. Wow. That, I sure I've heard of people struggling in just one market and you're crushing it in three. So, question about luxury [00:26:00] versus yeah. And I know we're kind of like diverting a little bit from motherhood, but it still all ties in.

You are clearly luxury level. Thank you. Yeah. But are you that same level? Because you said your pricing's different in every spot. Are you that same situation in every single market, do you think? .

Irene: Great question. Every market is totally different, and I think luxury means something different to every market as well. Yep. So in Utah, a hundred percent we are luxury. We are designing big and grand mountain things. Okay. In New York we are luxury. We are working. More like at six 20 or a Fifth Avenue hotel.

Like we are working at the bigger hotels still. Brooklyn Botanical Gardens. I mean, starting our office and going straight to Brooklyn Botanical Gardens was huge for us to be able to establish ourselves as a high end, high touch environment. Which is lovely. And then Connecticut, I will say we are kind of like more.

More lovely. [00:27:00] Yeah, more high mid. I think Connecticut is such a different. Atmosphere, if you even look at the vendors and how things operate. New York and Utah operate at a very high level in terms of process and SOPs and how they talk to clients and how they book people online and things like that.

Connecticut is very old school. So there's a lot of older players in the game, a lot of older venue managers, and they also do things sometimes all on paper or they only do a check or all of these things and you're pushing and gathering to like, we can operate on such a higher level guys. Like I promise it's gonna be okay.

So that, yeah, it kind of contributes to being the lovely, because the process is just much more old school. I think it's like more, it's still stuck in the process of 20 18, 20 19, like that kind of CRM management system for a lot of places, I'm loving that. New venues are popping up. I'm loving that.

A lot of venues have upgraded in Connecticut now and it's been so much [00:28:00] nicer to handle things. But there's still is that homegrown community. We operate together as a family and for the past 25, 30, 50 years, so. There's a little bit of balance there, but it's definitely at the higher end for sure.

Meredith: Yeah. 

Irene: Yeah, 

Meredith: no I'm just curious about that. I know it doesn't have a whole lot to do with motherhood, but really interesting it that you have. It does, yeah. Yeah. But I mean, I'm in the Boston market. I sadly have heard you know, floatings around that , if you're looking for a super high end vendor, it's not in Boston or it's not in the New England market, which is so surprising to me 'cause we have very talented people.

But I do wonder if it's a similar situation where we're a little more old school here, and like Boston in general is just known for being like that. That old school vibe 

Irene: right, yeah. When you get to this level, like you have to move faster. Yeah. You have to have a team, you have to be more open to multiple hands in the pot kind of thing.

And communication and collaboration. Right. But when you're not and you're really like, no, I only [00:29:00] like to work with this one person from this one company, and this is the only person that can deliver a tent at this venue, which we get all the time. And I'm like, guys, you're shooting yourself in the foot.

Meredith: Wow, this is very interesting stuff. I'm loving this.

Irene: I'm a super transparent human. Yeah, 

Meredith: no, me too. I mean, I think it shoots me in the foot a little bit, myself, 'cause I'm super transparent and super honest and Me too. Yeah. I'm just like, you know what? This is how it is. You know, 

Irene: like it or you don't, I mean.

Well, I think as a mom, like you said it before, like we don't really have time for any, for lack of a better term. I don't have time for the bullshit. Yeah. I truly, every minute of my calendar counts . When they have to go to school, when I need to be on a call, when I need to go do a venue visit, when the babysitter has to come in lunch, has to be pre-prepared so I can even go think about that stuff and know that they're gonna be okay and like they're going to eat what I want them to eat or they're gonna do the, you know what I mean?

Yeah. So we don't 

Meredith: have 

Irene: time for 

Meredith: bullshit. Yeah. Like 

Irene: getting around things like just don't, yeah. 

Meredith: No, it makes sense

 in what you're saying, [00:30:00] have you used specific routines and scheduling systems?

Like how do you manage it all? I'm very curious. Do you have a, do you know what, this is a debate that I have with my husband just. Just yesterday. Oh, okay. Yeah, like I used to use a written planner and he was like, you are so old school. Put it in your phone. Like that way we can connect all that things.

And I'm realizing I'm dropping the ball left and right because I don't have my physical planner. So unfortunately, I think for me, no matter what I have. Put everything in my phone and put it in my physical planner and look at both every single time.

I just don't know any way around it, but I'm very curious. What what systems do you use? What do you, how do you keep it all together? I mean, it has to be digital, right? Like you have to 

Irene: Oh, it has to. I'm too cross country all the time. Yep. We have. Okay, so how we organize our life. We have a family calendar of my husband and I, and we put everything on it.

And we are also both shared to our individual calendars so he can [00:31:00] see like what my day is today and what calls I have, and what meetings I'm doing, even though I'm not next to him in the same state today. So he even like in between calling and bedtime and things like that. In my calendars, I do block off.

Like I have to pick up the kids from school from this time to this time and I'm in charge of dinner that day. So that's blocked off. No one can schedule a meeting with me and I will block off like family days or like, hey, the fair or something's coming in town. So we're gonna block off that day to make sure that we get to go.

'cause I. Magically don't have a wedding on that Saturday. Yeah.

So I make it, 

a magical 

treat.

Meredith: I know people don't understand why I don't wanna schedule engagement sessions on Saturdays that I don't have weddings. I'm like, because it's '

cause my husband and my kids need me.

Yes. 

Because it's like the one time and they get the short end 

all summer. 

Yes, exactly. I 

Irene: feel horrible. Yeah. Every single summer we get to July and my husband's well what about this date and what about this date and what about this date? And I have to be like yes or no for the rest of the year.

And I'm like, I. I wanna say yes as much as possible. 'cause I do feel bad that our schedules don't always align. Yeah. So [00:32:00] it's always like a little bit of that guilt, but it's also but I'm working really hard to provide for my family. And I'm showing the kids what it's like to be like a woman business owner and like what it means to work hard.

So there's always that like I'm doing the right thing, but I feel really bad. I should I be doing more Like that constant struggle is like a daily like cycle. Yeah. And like I have really good girlfriends around me who. Ironically, some of them are moms and some of them are not. Who are constantly supporting me when I'm spiraling or something's happening at home, or Millie gets hurt at camp and they call me because they have my cell phone number, but they didn't call dad because he is in that state.

So I have to call dad and say, Hey, you need to go pick up Millie. This is what's happening. I need you to leave work and it's this whole thing. And then you pick up one. You have to pick up two. Yep. Because you can't go back. 'cause by the time you go back school's over 

Meredith: oh no. So every, I've just, that's a twin nuance.

I didn't know. So every time. One, every time 

Irene: something happens to one, you have to pick 'em both up. Oh my gosh. Because you're either [00:33:00] going home or you're either going to a doctor or something and you can't leave one and then come like it just ruins your whole day. Yeah. No, I need to move on. I'm gonna be stuck in five o'clock traffic if I do that, like that's not happening.

Oh geez. So I, right now at the preschool level, that is very much like you are together at the hip. Yeah. We need to continue together even though they're wildly different, but yeah. It's we, anyway, shared calendar. Okay. Shared resources, yeah. Is the point. Yep. And then I do also pre-plan like, hey, I'm traveling from this time to this time.

Are you okay taking the kids to school and all the things? If not, tell me now and we'll schedule babysitters or family to come in and we'll put it on the calendar of who has what date and at what time. So everyone knows what time everyone's showing up for their shift to kind of take care of. I primarily do a lot of the grocery shopping, so before any big trip within reason, if it's like a month, obviously I have to let it go. But there's a very specific list that, I like the kids to cycle through. So I do all the [00:34:00] shopping and I pre-wash all the lunch boxes and all the little to-go containers and I'm super specific and I'll even set him up for the first two days of me being gone of this is how you pack the lunch.

These are the things they like. This is the stuff. And he knows all this too. He's an amazing cook in the kitchen. He actually teaches Millie how to cook and it's great. The kids love to make their own lunches too now, which is so helpful when they're a little bit more independent. Yeah.

But like I show him, and even right before I left for this trip, he's like, can you just make me a lot of outfits and then fold it on the top shelf for them so I can just keep grabbing an outfit so I know it's supposed to go together. I was like, yes, I can. Aw. So I like folded all these shorts and t-shirts of here's Millie Stack.

Here's Gracie's Stack. This is what they like individually. These would go together on the days, but honestly, I don't care. As long as they're dressed and clean and here's how you do the hair. And he's such a girl dad now too. I've taught him how to braid hair and put the hair back and. The headbands and the bows and all the fun things that the girls love.

So you have two girls or girl and a boy? 

Meredith: Two 

Irene: girls. Two girls. Girls. [00:35:00] Okay. Two girls. 

Meredith: Sorry. 

Irene: Yes. That's amazing. He's totally a girl, dad. Aw. But yeah, but we like have lots of process and like lots of bins and lots of labels around the house and very specific. This is where things go. Laundry, all the things because if we don't have a process in our home to be able to keep it stable and support that we can't both be creative in our own right for work and then be able to hand off efficiently really.

Right. 'cause. We're just tripping over toys then, or oh my gosh, where's that thing? I need that the today? And I was like, I don't know. Why isn't it in the place? It should be like, this should not be a conversation right now. 

Meredith: I mean, need I show you the playroom? That's a, that's adjacent to my office.

Office. This is a laundry room and office. Let me tell 

Irene: you. Play playrooms are game changers. Yes. Anyone who says otherwise. Has never had one. 

Meredith: Yes, it's, I know you just, and I love that it's adjacent to my office because it's close enough, but [00:36:00] I can close it off. Oh yeah. But yeah, but also I have a laundry room and office together because I am in the laundry room.

70% of the time as I 90%. 90. Yeah. 90% of the time. Anyway, so I'm like, all right. Now what happened was we were building our house. And I needed to do a podcast actually, and we were staying in like an apartment that had no internet connection. So I, at the time, they were doing the floors on the downstairs, and that was supposed to be where my office was gonna be.

But I set up my computer here. I did the podcast in the laundry room, and then we both kinda looked at it and we were like, maybe that's a good spot for your office. So, it's, it was an accident, but it kind of happened and I had always set it, had it set up to be a craft desk here, just because I like to craft and my daughter loves to craft too.

So, but yeah, it turned into my office and it's right next to the playroom, which is, you know, mostly good. Sometimes not so great, but it [00:37:00] works.. 

Irene: Hey, whatever works today, yeah. May not work tomorrow, but that's okay. Right. I don't, I hate when people are like, oh, I need this whole system in place.

I have it all together, but I also don't have it all together. 'cause tomorrow everything could change and things, every time you care, who cares. Right. 

Meredith: Every time you travel. Right. It's a different conversation because they like different things. They need different things. You know what I mean? It's a whole 

Irene: thing where schedules changes.

It's a new camp. Yep. It's a new school, whatever it is. Yeah. Like we're constantly changing and evolving, but I think having your, having a little bit of grace and understanding that it's okay to allow change and , this is why I actually don't set long-term goals. I actually only set short-term goals.

Wow. Because like then I'm not allowing myself to have any grace to myself or my kids or my family, or allow myself to evolve to the new situation appropriately. And thrive appropriately. So, yeah, no change with your kids. Yeah. Your process doesn't need to always be perfect. And I'm sure my office is gonna change like 12 times this year too.

Yeah. So, we'll see what happens in the house this year. 

Meredith: How do you manage have you ever had to [00:38:00] take client calls while the kids are in the background? How do you Yes. Manage that? I love 

Irene: this. There might be a good story here. It's 

Meredith: so tricky. 

Irene: It's so tricky. I think. I can time out calls really well now.

So like new clients that are inquiring, of course. I'm not gonna say no. I'm gonna say yes and I know what parks are really good, that they're really confident in. So I'll go to a park and they'll be playing and they know mommy's on the phone, I'm gonna watch you, but is a secret phone call is what we call it.

So they have to be kind of quiet 'cause it's a secret. 

Meredith: Oh, okay. That's a good 

Irene: little tip. And they get really. They get really good at that. They don't really do any screen time. Yeah. At all. They have these little tablets that are like my old Kindles that I've just repurposed and they're all cracked and it's actually pretty bad.

Yeah. They need to go. I have the same 

Meredith: thing. We have old, yeah. I don't know if it's Kindles, the Amazon Prime stuff. Something 

Irene: like, I think it's Kindles, which is Prime Day. So I guess I should re redo them today. But. I save them. If I [00:39:00] know I'm gonna have a call coming up, I will save screen time for the time that I'm on the call and I will set them up nicely with brand new games or a brand new show on there, things like that.

I will also time out calls to be like around sleepy time, so like two, three o'clock in the afternoon. They don't nap anymore. Before I used to call it my nap time hustle, and they napped so consistently. I was so lucky. I could actually schedule calls, it was lovely. Now we just have like sleepy time where it's just like they wanna watch a bluey and that's okay.

But then I know I have 30 minutes before someone needs something, so I set them up. I don't starve them, but I don't give them a snack up until the call. And then I set them up with a show a snack. Lights are down, dogs are away. I am in the other room, I can see them, what's happening, but I'm in front of my computer and I have a call and I'm quickly going through like a 30 minute phone call for sure.

Oh my goodness. It's definitely happened. There are some clients that are kinder than others when it comes [00:40:00] to my kids. So if they need something right away, I will answer the phone. I'm transparent. I'm like, Hey, I wasn't expecting to chat with you. I'm actually with my kids at chick-fil-A or McDonald's or whatever, getting a milkshake.

But I'm happy to answer your calls, just know they're gonna be in the background and I start the conversation of the kids are here. 

Meredith: Yeah. 

Irene: I can give you all the answers you need. You will hear the kids. There's no getting around that. 

Meredith: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's good to know there's somebody else out there that has the same kind of you know, struggle.

Struggle. Yeah. I mean, just the fact that some clients are more understanding than others. I've chatted with other wedding planners in the past and it's also a struggle. I did notice you don't really share about the twins, like on your business profile. No. Yeah. So how do you kind of, do you feel like you're hiding it from 'em, or how do you go about that aspect in your business?

Irene: I don't know if it's any of their business, how many kids I have. Yeah. Or what my life structure is or where, what my address is or where I live today. Oh, that's true. Yeah. I don't know if it's any of their [00:41:00] business. I think their business is, I am your wedding planner. I, this is how I design, this is how my team operates.

This is how the process is. This is, how often we'll communicate whatever. That doesn't really have to do with my kids. Yeah. So I do keep that a little bit more private from a client perspective for sure. Of course it'll eventually come up, right? Because like I'll make a comment or be like, oh my God, my kids would love that.

I actually have one client, they both work in some capacity for nasa. And they're actually moving from the east coast to the west coast now, so it's kind of fun. I'm planning with them on both coasts, which is awesome. Oh, fun. 

Meredith: Yeah. 

Irene: But. My daughter is really into outer space and this person actually wrote a children's book for like outer space and like being a girl loving outer space and all these things.

I was like, oh my God, that's perfect for Gracie. So I got her the book and I had my bride sign it. Remember time I answered the call for my girls? Oh, did you talk to the, as they think she's an astronaut. Do you talk to the astronaut today? Yeah. How's her wedding going? Did we pick a color yet? I wanna make [00:42:00] sure I match my dress that day.

Oh my gosh. And they're super involved and know what their colors are now, but that bride specifically, she knows about the kids. Yeah. And she's been so kind and so loving and it's been lovely. I've taken them. I think I've taken the kids to a few like cleanups or like end of the weekend, brunch cleanups kind of thing, where the babysitter had to hand them off and there was two hours left.

It's just bring them, I don't know what to tell you. And I actually have some cute videos of me, like a kid on my hip and like fixing a linen. And there are times that things have gotta give and there's clients that accept that and there's clients that don't. Luckily most of my clients are really kind.

Oh, good. And . so ask about them like, oh my gosh, how are the kids today? Like when we're on calls, which is so lovely. Yeah. When we get to that point of the relationship. But during the client discovery process and online, I don't think it's anyone's business. Yeah. You don't know me yet. You're working with me, but you're also working with my team too.[00:43:00] 

And I also, I don't know maybe I've been burned and I guess many moms can attest to this too, that. Having kids doesn't make you unable to do your job or inaccessible or unqualified. If anything, I am able to manage two humans, plus a husband and plus a business. Yeah. I think I'm more qualified that I have kids.

Thank you. Yes, and yes, I Amen. But amen. But people like. You have kids, that must be really rough. You must not be able to dedicate as much time. I'm like, are you kidding me? I'm dedicating more time now than ever. Yeah, you can't mess around anymore i's such a misconception. Right? And I don't really wanna go into having to defend myself.

All over again. So I just keep it private now until I make a relationship and then of course it will come up and it's part of the process and that's okay. But I don't, I think from that too, I've become a really strong advocate for women in general when people are in conversations, regardless if they have kids or not.

But I. [00:44:00] People are making plans or wanting to go out, or they're looking at a different venue for something or a different florist for things, and they'll be like, oh, well I don't know if she'll wanna come. She has a lot on her plate, or, I don't know, she just had a baby. I'm not sure if she'll wanna come. I was like, let her say no.

I'm sorry, I don't think you had to make her decision. So giving people the full opportunity and the full understanding to be a part of whatever it is, let her make her own boundaries. That's not your job. 

Meredith: Yes. No I appreciate everything you're saying. I actually, I do ask this question pretty much to everybody because everyone has different thoughts on it.

So some people are like, no, I share this is my life. This is how I track clients. All that. And then you know, other people are like, Nope, I'm not talking about it at all. Other people, it's you know, they'll mention it if they have to. But they won't necessarily it's just such a hot topic to me just because I think everyone has different views, and so part of why I wanted to start the podcast was to make sure that people hear that there are various ways to look at this. [00:45:00] Like you don't have to pigeon a hole yourself into one situation or another. I know for me personally, I do share a lot about the kids, but I'm navigating more towards a personal brand than just photography, just because I do a million other things too, as you do too with the podcast and all that.

Are you seeing a shift in your clientele? Is it more Gen Z? What is it?

Irene: I think I'm seeing a little bit of a shift, but I also think I, I think I'm seeing a shift in a lot of other ways. I've done a ton of second weddings this year. Oh. So a much older crowd, but they still want like the full, luxurious design, like up at Montage on a Great, let's go.

Yeah, let's 

Meredith: do it. 

Irene: So that's been a, that's been a, that's been a new, not new, but like more often this year. Okay. All my other clients, I think they range in the age of 25 to 35. Still, I think I'm still in that kind of age range, but you definitely can see how the new generation thinks. I mean, [00:46:00] we're very much like a storytelling brand, so.

As I present myself and how we want to do things after 10 years, I don't wanna do the same tent wedding in the backyard. I wanna understand your love story. I wanna understand why we're even here and why is this worth it? To spend hundreds of thousands of dollars and then be able to design and make the day appropriate to them, which.

Inherently attracts a little bit more a mature crowd regardless of their age, because they have themselves a little bit more established. They know who they are, they can make decisions a little bit better. And they understand what that final product would be. And even if they, come to me, I think when I'm bringing on 2026, that's where I'm seeing more of the shift, that they're much younger, they have definitely different priorities.

Yeah. And. I'm seeing them and I'm al I'm not training them, but I'm definitely pushing them into making smarter, more mature decisions than I think they would've if another planner had been like, yeah, that sounds great. Let's just go off your Pinterest board and we'll continue [00:47:00] forward there.

Like I am trying to develop them to have a little bit more of a mature outlook on their wedding day. Which I very much upfront tell them, like, this is how I do things. This is how it happens. I don't just do blue pretty flowers on a ceiling because it looks pretty like there's a meaning and a reason behind it.

Like that one blue wedding that everyone's been talking about this summer, the he actually from the beginning of them dating has gotten her hydrangeas for every single major event of her entire. Relationship. So birthdays, anniversaries, things like that. So it was really important that she was like, hugged in, what would've represented all the flowers that he gave her prior.

Aw. So there's reasons we do big things. 

Meredith: That, that is so cool. . That everything has a meaning behind it. I think that's very important.

so yeah. Then the last question I always ask everyone is 'cause I'm loving this conversation. It's been so great. But I ask everyone if you have a couple moms that you've noticed in the wedding industry that you've worked with that you think [00:48:00] they're doing a great job? Any kind of shout outs? You wanna give any thoughts that come to mind? Oh my gosh. 

Irene: Two people come to mind. Miranda over a snap pop party in Utah. She does like balloon installations, fun, custom rentals and all these really cool I don't know what she doesn't do.

She's incredible. That's awesome. She is just as busy, if not busier than I am. And she has a beautiful little boy named Miles. And so I think we are the best, we are the best of friends in the ways that, like I, we see the same struggle. We see the same comment from our kids of mom, do you have to have another meeting right now?

Things like that. Like they, they in June, it's really hard. Yeah. And we. Constantly share the feelings of, are we doing enough? Are we doing too much? Are we failing as a mom and putting too much into our clients? Or vice versa in the winter, are we failing as a business owner because we're spending too much time with our kids?

Like I feel like we share that same [00:49:00] pattern all the time and we're constantly leaning on each other and I'm just in awe of her, of the empire she's built and how amazing she has made Miles a part of the whole process. Hanging out at the warehouse and making his own little space and it's, she's truly a someone I look up to every day.

That's awesome. How to manage things. So shout out to her. I should go follow her Snap pop party in Utah. And then Heather feel, or Heather, I guess Heather and Terrance are a couple. Apollo Fields is their company. They are photographers based out of New Jersey, and they just opened a new venue. Oh.

And they, wow. They are, oh my gosh. You should definitely reach out to her. She's the epitome of photography like. Doing weddings with the baby, she used to do it with a baby strapped to her and people would expect the baby there. And they're like, why didn't you bring the baby? And she's what do you mean I get my arms free today?

Are you, what do you mean? I didn't bring the baby for the wedding. Two weddings, so 

Meredith: Oh my 

Irene: goodness. When they were really little [00:50:00] and you could hold them like that's a thing. And now they're both our kids are the same age now. 

Meredith: Whoa. So I couldn't, I could not do that. Wait, they've

Irene: they, oh my God, it's awesome.

Yeah, 

Meredith: she's, no, I mean she's incredible power to her. She travel, travels with 

Irene: them to do destination weddings with them. She's very similar mindset of, just because I had kids doesn't mean I stopped. If not, I grew bigger. And she handles it with such grace and is doing an amazing job. 

Meredith: Yeah. So everyone open the venue too.

So I feel like all of us, we opened the venue 

Irene: in New Jersey. I feel like we all 

Meredith: have such a passion for the wedding industry that we then shift into like multiple areas of it. I don't know. I feel like I see it more with moms. Yeah. 

Irene: Yeah. Because I mean, we know the value of our time and we also know the value of investment and we have mouths to feed and.

Multiple kids, but through school, let's be honest. So the profit needs to be higher in order to support a family and be here full time in a place that we love. So educating people around you and contributing to the community [00:51:00] online and really supporting other moms and other players, and being a voice to people who might feel scared or anxious or, oh my gosh, I'm not enough anymore because I have to split my brain into five different ways.

That's okay. But if we represent and we can understand and we can grow together as a community, everyone else benefits. So there is no competition here of oh, well I'm gonna lock all my secrets of how I figured this out. No, who cares? There's another mom in the same position that I was and I wanna make sure she could send her kid to preschool so she can take meetings and have a more sustainable calendar for her own mental health.

Meredith: Yes. Yes. And I'm glad we are reaching some people that. Might be just getting the pink lines on their test and being like, what do I do? Yeah. So, it's okay. Yeah. You can do it like putting it out there you're not alone. You guys, it, it can't be done. You can totally do it.

Yeah. If I 

Irene: can do it with two, I mean, you can totally do it. If you can do with you two in 

Meredith: three different markets . Oh my gosh. You can do it. Yeah, it's possible. You're just like opening my mind. This whole conversation has just opened my mind to [00:52:00] like any anything's possible. So I really, I'm so glad you came on today.

Can you share how people can get in touch with you or where and how they can 

Irene: follow you all that? Yeah. Irene and co events I think it's Irene co events on all of the platforms, so Instagram, TikTok, now. I do relentlessly. We're on it. Yep. Facebook.